Classy Predictions - Penn State at Minnesota

By the Section 117 Classy Gentlemen

Rap and Big Party predict more good times ahead.

Everyone wins! That was fun!

Last week we all picked Minnesota to win by varying degrees, and we were all right! It's always a fun week when the Classy Gentlefolk all predict a happy Saturday in Gopherland and it actually comes true. Now, everyone is at least .500 after two weeks! Handshakes and fake money all around!

Thanks to two weeks of optimism, Rap, Big Party, Flony and Brooks lead the standings at 2-0. We're going to give Big Party the overall win for his 33-31 prediction, as he accurately predicted Minnesota to win a high-scoring game by a very close margin. Party and Bruiser both win "Price is Right" style points for getting closest to the Hoosiers score without going over, and Higgy was within one point of the Gophers' total. Also, Brooks impressively predicted the margin of victory despite being an infant.

The Higgins brothers also made good on a few specific predictions, as Bruiser correctly identified Nelson's TD passes to Goodger and Engel, and Higgy also predicted an Engel score and a big day by RB David Cobb.

This week, optimism continues to swirl throughout Section 117 as our squad looks to make it four wins in a row. Also, we welcome  a new special guest to the prediction segment - Gopher Hole regular Gopher Bandanna Guy. He sits above us at the Bank, and tosses his opinion down to 117 from 219. Welcome to the mix! New friends in Gopherhood are fun!

Let's take an updated look at the standings, and proceed to the predictions. It's a Minnesota sweep, along with the first overtime prediction we've seen thus far.

Classy Prediction Standings
Rap 2-0
Big Party 2-0
Flony 2-0
Brooks Magsh 2-0
Melissa Magsh 1-0
Butler 1-0
Kellen 1-0
Gopher Bandanna Guy 0-0
Magsh 1-1
Bruiser 1-1
Higgy 1-1

CLASSY PREDICTIONS - PENN STATE AT MINNESOTA
NOV. 9, 2013 - 11 A.M. - TCF BANK STADIUM

RAP
2-0, 1 OVERALL WIN
MINNESOTA 35, PENN STATE 27
The Gophers will never trail in this game. The Phil "The Closer" Nelson to Maxx "Double X" Williams connection will prove to be the difference. Dale Rapovich prediction: Gophers 38, Penn State, 35. Ski-U-Mah!

BIG PARTY
2-0, 1 OVERALL WIN
MINNESOTA 27, PENN STATE 24
I’ll admit that I’m terrified of this game because I don’t know how to root for a favorite.  I’m going to try to shed some off my pre-Jerry Kill Gopher sports anxiety and pick the Gophers to win a tough one.  On offense, the jet sweep action will do enough to spread out a formidable Penn St front 7 so that Cobb will be able to get enough tough yards up the middle to control the clock (I’m thinking 25-30 carries for just around 100 yards).  Also, Nelson (and maybe Jones on the pass option that I totally freaking called because I’m awesome!) will catch a vulnerable secondary napping for a couple big play touchdowns on the play action.  On defense, the D-line has to get pressure on “Little Sister” Christian Hackenberg to prevent him from getting the ball out to a big and talented WR core, which includes one of the best in the country in Allen Robinson.  A classic bend but don’t break defense coupled with a clock control offense powers the Gophers to victory but keeps us biting our nails through our mittens the entire game.

FLONY
2-0
MINNESOTA 38, PENN STATE 23
Minnesota keeps on rolling as they control the clock and limit the freshman phenom to a shaky game at the Bank. Minnesota utilizes a heavy dose of the run game while getting Maxx involved via the play action for two touchdowns. Minnesota also keeps moving its bowl projection East, flirting with the idea of invading Central Florida for citrus and half-priced Tim Tebow Broncos jerseys. 

BROOKS MAGSH
2-0
MINNESOTA 10, PENN STATE 7
That’s right, I’m getting my toes involved for counting, too! You’ll all be happy to know that one of the 10 or so words I now know is “touchdown!”

MELISSA MAGSH
1-0
MINNESOTA 38, PENN STATE 30
Am I supposed to be more or less scared of a lion of it has the qualifier “nittany?” I’m going with less.

BUTLER
1-0
MINNESOTA 27, PENN STATE 24 (OT)
Sluggish offensive performances by both teams leave the Gophers trailing 21-13 late in the 4th quarter.  A touchdown and 2-point conversion to tie send the game to overtime where Penn State kicks a field goal in the first round and the Gophers score a quick TD to salt the game away. 

KELLEN
1-0
MINNESOTA 34, PENN STATE 27
Phillip Nelson throws for over 300 yards and the Gophers make a defensive stop on a Damien Wilson fumble recovery late in the 4th quarter to prevent Penn State from tying the game. 

GOPHER BANDANNA GUY
0-0
MINNESOTA 22, PENN STATE 17 (and yes, there's a Gopher safety in there)
With all the positivity flying around the Gophers this week, it’s almost starting to sound like this game is a gimme.  It most is certainly not.  Despite the Gophs are flying high coming off a 3rd straight conference win (and 2nd road win), and the Jekyl and Hyde nature of the Nittany Lions between home/away games, this game will be a tough, ugly, slug fest.   No, Penn State doesn’t have a bowl to play for and they are rolling with a dinged up frosh QB named Hackenberg.  But Penn State will attempt to do everything in their power to slow our run game down, 9 in the box at times,  and Limegrover will still force the issue. This will lead to a tight first half, and frustrated fans.  But Limegrover will stay the course, and it will pay off come mid 3rd quarter, when PSU’s lack of depth starts to catch up with them, and the Gopher ground game starts to wear things down.  Lead procured late 3rd and held through the 4th.

MAGSH
1-1
MINNESOTA 30, PENN STATE 27
Word association time: Penn State, Jerry Sandusky, Sandusky Ohio, Cedar Point, Point Break, Breaking Bad, bad to the bone, bone-jarring hits, Ra’Shede Hageman, Gophers, victory!

BRUISER
1-1
MINNESOTA 31, PENN STATE 27
I predict that the Gophers will do just enough on a blustery Saturday morning at the Bank to make it four straight B1G victories.  Other than one touchdown pass from Christian Hack-job to Allen Robinson, the Gopher defense keeps Penn State’s passing game under control.  On the other side of the ball, the home team mixes their ground and air attacks nicely to the tune of two passing TDs, two rushing TDs, and one field goal for little insurance.  On the bright side for Penn State, they only need to purchase one airplane ticket home because the entire team and all of their gear can fit in the giant, gaping hole in Bill O’Brien’s chin. Gopher fans wonder if a four-game winning streak is finally enough to get us out of the dreaded 11 a.m. slot when the BADgers come to town on November 23rd.  (Hey ESPN and BTN, we need more time to tailgate!)

HIGGY
1-1
MINNESOTA 31, PENN STATE 24
I have thought about this a lot, and for some reason this score just feels right to me. I think, at home, we're a touchdown better than the Nittany Lions. I could be making this up, but they're much worse on the road than in Happy Valley, and that will again be the case as momentum continues to crest in Minneapolis. The Classy Gentlemen enjoy a brisk breakfast tailgate in Lot 37, then are treated to another nice day by Full Nelson, as the Gopher QB runs for a pair of scores and tosses two more - one to Double X and the other for the first collegiate score for Drew Wolitarsky, who sneaks behind a defense focused on Engel and Donovahn "The 'H' is Silent" Jones. Allen Robinson has a big day against our DBs and Penn State finds some success on the ground, but Hackensack tosses a pair of picks. Section 117 is jubilant, the bye week becomes one of reflection and good vibes, and the Jerry Claeys combo picks up steam for B1G Coach-of-the-Year.